THE Glamorganshire Golf Club’s Winter Competition, “Snakes & Ladders” teed off on Sunday on the same day as the Cardiff Half-Marathon. Both Ladies’ and Men’s Captains, Justine Blunsden and Leon Reece were running for their joint charity, Cystic Fibrosis, and completed the course in creditable times.

Leon even made it back in time for the speeches, but was reticent as to which Captain ran the faster time. A persistent drizzle looked as if it would make for a challenging morning, but, thankfully it cleared by 8:30 and the golf was played in excellent conditions.

Lennie and Maurice have a colossal combined handicap, which means that they get a shot for half of the handicap difference. This should mean that, theoretically, with judicious shot management, that they should prevail for most of their matches, particularly as Maurice’s partner, Lennie is proud to point out that he is a former winner of the competition. Unfortunately, his boundless optimism did not take into account that Maurice too have figured in despatches at the Snakes Supper, but, as a “Wooden Spoonist”.

They approached Sunday with a degree of optimism, which was to be cruelly shattered after the first six holes.

Their opponents were Greg and Nick, who both hit the ball miles, but not necessarily in the right direction, and had to give them 12 shots. Maurice drove off the 17th after Nick’s monster drive, but Maurice’s found the fairway, and Greg feeling his way into the match after a heavy night on Saturday duffed his shot from the semi-rough. Maurice and Lennie won that hole with a five and took the 18th with a four to go two up.

Their opponents won the next two holes for all-square and they halved the third. The 524 yard fourth proved to be a perfect example of the shot management and outrageously bad golf for which the Snakes is renowned.

The actual sequence of shots is not really important. Suffice to say that after both pairings approached the green via trees, rough, bushes, bunkers and better-looking fairways, that Maurice and Lennie’s 11 net 10 trumped their eleven.

Realising that they were in danger of being embarrassed, Greg and Nick began to hit the ball even further and, Nick, in particular, started putting to his handicap of 14. Maurice had left the white towel required for such occasions in the car, and they were put out of their misery on the 13th losing five and three.

Dave Hancock, their newly-installed Chief Snake gave an accomplished and animated inaugural address, using news from the course, visual aids, comedy, musical instruments and audience participation to engage his audience.

It was good, it was funny and it was long, so, unfortunately, many had to leave before “Downton Abbey” was aired. Next week, Lenny and Maurice are playing John and Wayne, and, again, they receive 12 shots. Lenny has decided to play bowls on Wednesday, instead of their usual round, reasoning that they were over-prepared last week, and that they should play their natural games. It does not bode well.

Maurice Flynn